Being Single: It Is Not All Fun And Games
THAT’S NOT ALWAYS EASY BEING A SINGLE, BUT YOU CAN MAKE THE BEST OF IT !
Being single is not easy. This means, first day we are all responsible for every decision we make. We can not share decision making because there is not close enough to share. We trust our friends, but we formed a bond as close as we do in a long term relationship. Therefore, it is up to us to decide what we do every day, if we are to work, so we'll have for dinner, where we will go to a weekend, what we do on vacation and where and how to socialize.
When we get home at night no one there (how often have dogs and cats) to welcome us. We prepare dinner alone (or do not bother), run a bath, take a shower and generally living a lonely life marked by social life and friends as well as routine work. One of the main problems of being single is not being able to discuss things in our mind when we want. In social circles can to some extent, and we can call friends on the phone, but this lacks the deeper understanding and compassion we have received from a close partner in a relationship.
Ideas we like to play together, talk, talk, think aloud and pillow talk in the future. All this is lost when one. Occasional dates or romantic encounters may provide passing by, but in reality we are still one. There is something interesting on TV, but we will not talk about it until we are at work. We have a disease that concerns us, it is undisputed that? There is a problem with someone at work, what to do. Friends and family play a role, but do not fill that singleness is likely to feel.
Cooking for one is a painful experience. What is the point of cooking a good meal if there is nobody to share it. Not a great movie, but let's look alone. We have to go shopping and get something new for the apartment, but we have to do without the pleasure of deciding together. Then, of course, is sex. Sex-for-one is well known to most of the singles, but this is not what they were designed.
Close relationships offer companionship, understanding, empathy, friendship and love and romance, and without them, more or less to our own resources to fill that void. When we're younger do not focus so much that can not be a problem, but as we age we begin to discover that visiting the wonders of the world is deeply unsatisfactory.
Being single is a greater sense because our society emphasizes couples. A meal for two at the grocery store to pay the single supplement in hotels, and much more is against the person. Why pay more for a single bed when on vacation? We have friends who are couples who do much to increase our sense of singleness. Holidays mean they are excluded for not having a partner, or correspond to some geek who have little in common with friends desperate to pair us.
The society of adults in the west consists of approximately 33% only and this is increasing at a remarkable pace. It is true that in many areas of the service industry, individuals are seen as a new market and opportunities to take advantage of the single life and not to enter the market. But once again the focus of a game state does not want to be remembered. When we went on a weekend we will find many many companions on the road and wonder what has that brought the total treasures that no one seems to know?
Therefore, the only way to be optimistic. It means keeping a positive face of adversity. That adversity manifests itself through the thought in the back of the head that whispers "what if ..". What if we meet someone tomorrow, what if we move to the single life and not knowing anyone, never fell in love, what if nobody likes it, so if we are destined to remain single. And it is this whispering to fight to keep out a daily struggle to remain optimistic.
The optimism comes from knowing that most of us know someone, we find Mr. or Miss Right soon. But as we age, we begin to worry, even panic in silence. If we find our perfect match has to happen before it is too old. We would like to happen while we are still very young. And as anyone in their 30's can be seen, as we age, so it accelerates the time. In the twenty years, time seemed endless. However, as the wrinkles at the corners of the eyes shows that one day we wake up and are higher, much higher. And we're still alone.
Being single is a measure of success. This means we have to avoid the disappointment of dating disasters, wrong choices, and loneliness within a terrible relationship. This means we still have our own decisions and our own sense of direction. We have the full sense of self-determination and control over their destiny. But at the same time we have. It can be hard to admit, but the vast majority of us do not like being single. In fact we hate it.
I hate it because I did not share. It can be crisp passing the head of the perfect relationship we know is possible with the right partner. Never ending well of "giving" that has so far been ignored. We give and we want to please. We love and we want that opportunity. We are ready and willing, but are not allowed. It's almost like being in solitary confinement in prison. Being single increases our sense of the need for and frustration increases accordingly.
Being unique is not a cornfield full of casual sex, drunken nights, the general lack of responsibility and carefree existence over the age of 25. It is a burden that many of us carry. Through the relationships we have created a mental list of things that never again accept a relationship and at the same time it provokes and overpowering explanation of what we really expect. Being single is not about elections, which the circumstances. We know that if we had been a certain place, had a little life, then you probably will not be one. But where we are today means that we are. So we are at this time.
For the date to keep our hopes alive. We realize that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. And while the most recent suitor may not have been the one for us, at least going in the right direction. And this is how many of us against one. We do our best to keep our hopes alive. We convince ourselves that being single is a choice and we are waiting to fulfill the right. And that is true, that's exactly what we are doing. But the 'what if' whispers away. Our biological clock can be made stronger, hair may thin, but we know we will reach the end. Hope.
Being the only form of life with a sense of frustration that little else can match. We have the answers to why we are alone. We can even ask Why me? "This is how we plan our lives, we have not seen our future. Why did it happen? What went wrong. Where do we go wrong? Where are the good guys and girls. Perhaps they have all been snapped up. Perhaps simply not there and are fooling ourselves. Here we are reminded of the few examples of great friends in great relationships, and this gives us the temporary proof we need. And then started another question. We may even question our own trial, asked if he misses the best chance of being in a relationship. Maybe they are too demanding? Perhaps what is really our fault. But of course not.
When holidays and Christmas holidays and Thanksgiving and going, then we are reminded heavily just. On Valentine's Day also reminds us that we are once again this year solitary creatures. However, this year will be different. Sorry. We have an eye on one or two potentials and who knows where it can carry. Who knows, Christmas can be compromised.
Married people often that the grass is greener on the other side. People in bad relationships dream of the freedom of being alone. I've said many times that I do not know how lucky they are to be unique. The next time someone tells me, I'll go and put my finger in the eye and remind myself that I was lucky that I decided to do that .. myself.
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