Being Angry After Your Ex Breaks Up With You

By Marie Babenko


Are you angry about your breakup? Are there times when you just want to call your ex up and give them a piece of your mind? Are you feeling that you didn't deserve to get your heart broken and now you're both hurt and upset about your breakup for a whole list of different reasons? What do you do with this anger? Can your anger actually help you to get your ex back?

I'm sure there are times when you think you'd feel a whole lot better if you could just blast your ex and let them know how angry you are with them. You might even fantasize about what you would say and how you would say it. In the back of your mind you know that nothing good will come of it and that such an outburst might just close that door on a relationship with your ex in the future if you decide that this is what you want. You might just wind up saying a few things that you will wind up regretting and you're not really one to burn bridges even though it's very tempting at times.

You should keep this in mind though. This anger and outrage over your breakup and how you were treated is a sign of good things to come. Being upset about how you were treated or being angry with your ex is a sign that you are starting to feel good about yourself again. You're standing up for yourself even if it's only in your mind. At least you know that you deserve better and you didn't deserve to be treated this way. Everyone makes mistakes and everyone deserves a second chance and the benefit of doubt in a loving relationship, right?

In the beginning, right after the breakup, you probably felt horrible. You believed everything that your ex said and you were in agreement that you were to blame for the breakup. It was your own fault and you had nobody to blame except for yourself. You probably begged and pleaded and offered to change in order to please your ex and get them to agree to take you back. All of this is very normal and it's a stage that we all have to go through.

After a while the pain from the breakup begins to fade or they work on rebuilding their life and their self-image. Once you start to begin to feel better about yourself you might start to feel angry with your ex. You might begin to feel that your ex was wrong about you. You might feel that you didn't deserve to be hurt. You might even realize that your ex didn't break up with you for the reasons that they stated. The underlying reason for most breakups is a lack of respect and once you start to have more respect for yourself, your chances of winning your ex back skyrockets.

So, take your anger as a sign that you are healing and that better days are ahead. You might not want to act out on this anger and you should probably avoid your ex when you are feeling particularly angry but there will come a day once you get back together when you can voice your displeasure and probably get an apology from your ex. Until then, continue to rebuild your self-esteem and understand that you are moving in the right direction if you are hoping to get your ex back.




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